Cats and Dogs

It’s a debate as old as animal domesticity. 

Cats or dogs?

Or, to phrase as the kind of question one might be asked on a date or at a dinner party: 

Are you a cat person or a dog person?

Now, let’s get this straight: I love dogs. I can’t imagine not loving dogs and having them in my life. We have Annie, a rat terrier rescued from the hard streets of the Bronx, and I adore her. Before that, it was Bandit, another rat terrier who was Angela’s childhood dog, who I then rescued from an animal shelter in Westchester County. (Long story, that one.) I adored her, too.

Growing up, my family always had dogs. When I was a baby, Greta, a gorgeous German shepherd. Then Tasha, a golden retriever, and Bud, an American Eskimo. (Bud remains the namesake of my dad’s office building; people often ask if he’s affiliated with Anheuser-Busch.) Then Cali, a shepherd mix that was abandoned at a nearby home and was a sweetheart, albeit a head case. Lady, a dopey mutt who followed my dad home on a walk and never left. Chloe, a playful pooch from the pound that I had a special connection with. Today, my parents have Morgan and Adrian, two incorrigible mutts. In the future, I imagine a house full of rat terriers just like Bandit and Annie. 

So yes, I love dogs. 

But when people ask, of course I say I’m a cat person. 

You’d be amazed at the looks this answer will get you. (Especially as a man, which is kind of offensive, if you think about it.) The question itself is quite silly, and it has no wrong answer. Being a cat person doesn’t mean I have any issue with dogs. I’m sure that most people who call themselves cat people love dogs as much as I do. 

I’d given up on trying to explain myself. Why should I have to do that, anyway?

One time I responded to the question with a question: “What would you like more — a dog that acts like a cat, or a cat that acts like a dog?”

“A cat who acts like a dog,” the person said. 

So what does that mean, to act like a dog? And who says cats can’t act the same way?

Dogs are fun.

Julie is a blast. Over the years, we’ve had countless games. There’s Shoe — this one is pretty hilarious. I run a shoe along the ground and she chases it. For some reason, if she sees me pulling a shoe along the ground, she’ll chase after it every time. When she gets it, she attacks it with an amusing ferocity. There’s the Red Dot game, beloved by cats across the world, which will be the subject of a future post. There’s the variety of toys she’ll play with. And there’s the old classic, Hide and Seek, which Julie delightfully partakes in. I can tell she’s ready to play from a certain gleam in her eye. I’ll run behind a couch, or to another room, and hide around a corner — and seconds later, she bounds in to find me. She’ll pounce on me, predator-style, but without claws or jaws. Then we’ll do it again, and again, sometimes five or more times. 

Dogs are sociable. 

Julie spends hours each day on me or next to me. There have been weekends when she’s spent ten-plus hours on my lap. My ideal weekend day consists of a long couch nap with Julie, and is bookended by multiple sessions of Netflix, sports watching, or video gaming with Julie on my lap. 

Dogs miss you when you’re gone.

Julie runs to the door when I get home. It was the highlight of my day in Staten Island — I’d open the door to that crappy studio apartment, and she would awake from a dead sleep to greet me. 

Now, I’m not oblivious. Cats and dogs are different in many ways. Julie remains skeptical of strangers, although she’s gotten better at this in her older age. But when a new person shows up, she’ll hide, for an hour or two anyway. Cats love you in a different way, and they don’t love everyone equally. (Isn’t that the definition of loyalty?) 

Moreover, when you love a cat, you learn important lessons about life and dealing with people. 

Cats can sense your loneliness, your neediness, your desperation. These qualities repel cats, just as they repel people. 

You learn that to get a cat’s approval, it must be on the cat’s terms. 

You learn patience. 

And you learn some higher-level people skills, too. Because there are many people in this world who do what you want them to do, but only if it’s on their terms. That’s the basics of manipulation, is it not? Convince someone else that what you want is their idea. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve seen this play out in personal and professional situations, and I always imagine it’s the dog people (just kidding, I love y’all) who rush in blindly while the cat people wait and let the matter play out in their favor.